What is the best compliment I have ever received from one of my clients? At the end of one of our sessions he said, "Well that didn't feel like therapy, it felt like a couple of people sitting at the bar talking about things that really matter. Thanks, I learned a lot."
Well, hot damn. For some therapists, this wouldn't be a compliment. For this therapist, that's the best compliment I could ever get. I don't want my therapy to feel like therapy. I want the guys I see to feel comfortable coming to our sessions AND I want them to get a lot out of it. I can do both.
| I can provide excellent therapy without making it feel all "therapy-ey." |
Something I hear from a lot of my male clients is that they were worried about coming to therapy for the first time. They have a picture in their head that it's going to be a
ll "and how does that make you feel" questions from a breathy-voiced weirdo in glasses and the whole experience will be uncomfortable. Yeah, there are definitely therapists out there that have this style. And for some people, that's going to be the style that works best for them. But for a lot of guys, that is their worst fear.
The counseling you get with me is comfortable, relaxed banter.
My style is direct. I tell it like I see it. You can get pacified by the people that are close to you. You have done enough 'not talking' about what is going on in your life with your buddies. It's time to get this shit figured out. You have run out of time and need to make changes quickly to try to save your relationship. And if it's too late for your relationship, it's time to get this figured out for yourself so you can be better for yourself and maybe even your next relationship.
So that's what I can offer you. The chance to fix what's going on for you with a therapist you will be comfortable with. It will be like sitting at a bar, talking about the things that really matter, but without the drinks.
Corrin Voeller is a relationship therapist in St. Louis Park, Minnesota. She does in-person and online counseling and coaching with couples and individuals to improve the relationships in their lives. She lives with her husband, children, and extremely fat dog.
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